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This is the beginning of a series I will be doing called Toxic: whatever I perceive to be detrimental in my way of living, in society, and life as a whole. Today I want to address the toxicity of keeping your feelings to yourself and how not expressing them causes anger, discomfort, and ultimately more fear and anxiety. Disclaimer: I may be jumping around as I talk my feelings through, but it all connects so stay with me. As per my last post, I shared how petty I can be as a person and how I am aware of my personified monster and how it can be harmful. It has been about weeks since the said event took place, and we are still in a place of passive aggressive silence and ignorance. Like we all know, communication is a two way street.


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When I ventured into this business, I thought my style and my calligraphy were good enough. So this is where you need to just stop comparing yourself to all the other wedding stationery business owners out there. Just switch off all of those Instagram accounts and stop Pinterest surfing and find some original sources of inspiration. As I began to close myself off from what other stationery designers at the time were doing, I managed to continue to work more and more on just creating and playing around with illustrations. I tried to develop my artistic skills as much as possible. Eventually there came a time where I stepped back and saw a commonality that started to develop throughout the wedding invitations.



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At times cities became very crowded, squalid places from which people really wanted to escape. Particularly in recent years there have been problems with school systems and crime in cities that pushed people out. We also had a large number of policy decisionsmortgage and tax policy decisionsthat greatly encouraged buying a new house rather than buying or renting. We had huge amounts of federal dollars flowing toward highway construction, but not toward public transit in cities. So that really facilitated and subsidized moving to the suburbs. Interestingly, if you project forward we are probably now peaking in the availability of petroleum worldwide. That may profoundly change the way the suburbs function. If that suburban house is no longer easily reachable by car that may soon become the only choice for many people. No, I think we are actually seeing some reversal already. If you look at all the major American cities you see several things going on. The first is that there is a revival of interest in living in town.



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As I approached nearer to it I again sent Thring to climb a tree to see if there was any change. He could see nothing but the same description of forest and scrub. The change that he saw from the other tree was the shade of the sun on the lower mulga bushes, which caused him to suppose that it was more open country. Not seeing any opening in that direction, I changed to the gum trees. At a mile and a half was delighted at the sight of a chain of fine water holes; their course north west to south east, the flow apparently to south east. I followed one pond, which was about half a mile long and appeared to be deep. A number of smaller ones succeeded. They then ceased, and I crossed a small plain, which shows signs of being at times covered with water. Observing some green and white barked gum trees on the west side of it, I went to them, and found a small watercourse with small pools of water, which flowed into the plain coming from the north west. Following it a little further, we met with some more water. A short distance above this it ceased in the dense forest which seems to surround these ponds.

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